It’s early days. You’re drunk. Your phone is yet to have a breathalyzer feature. You send a text. We’ve all been there. You are too eager and you are going to freak him/her out. Put down the phone. I beg you. Put down the fucking phone – You are going to have to buy a … Continue reading
Tagged with dating …
The basis of the bases
When I was a teenager we had 4 bases. 1st: kiss 2nd: boobie grab (outside bra) 3rd: anything below the belt 4th: pee pee in wee wee Oh how times have changed. Word behind the bike sheds is we now have 10 bases! Those crazy Gen Y and Millenials sure know how to complicate a … Continue reading
Speed dating. No illicit drugs, unfortunately.
I don’t want to poo poo all speed dating. But its shit. Well the one I went to was. Ill set the scene. 12 attractive women all dressed to impress, hair coiffed, lovely dresses, slight boobage. Most likely they all have careers and are fantastic at giving blow jobs whilst making a porcini risotto. … Continue reading
When is a break up a break up?
So. I met a guy and we’ve been dating for the last month or so. I was optimistic but not crazy. No hopes were up just a gentle hum of expectation. But alas. It is not to be. Now I’m faced with – is this a breakup? At what point did we become linked in … Continue reading
All The Single Ladies (all the single ladies)
I’ve finally turned a corner. And I don’t care who is around the bend. Whoa that shit deep. If you could hear my thoughts over the last 12 months of being truly single, my internal monologue would sound something like this: Oh he looks nice. Will I die alone? I should have shaved my legs. … Continue reading
First Dates. Like going to the dentist without the drugs.
So you got a date – Yay for you hot stuff! You are probably overwhelmed with worry’s. Its Ok, I usually get Diarrhoea before a date. I have a nervous bowel. I’m not sure why its nervous, maybe its IBS? Anyway thats for another time. Nerves can be easily addressd by following my first date diet: … Continue reading
Girl Staying Single? 